


Thought Process

by fishfingersandjellybabies



Series: Dad!Jason AU [23]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 22:39:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6828073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fishfingersandjellybabies/pseuds/fishfingersandjellybabies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason wouldn’t let the Joker wreck his life a second time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thought Process

**Author's Note:**

> Since this was talked about a bit recently. Damian’s about 3.5. Apparently I love writing about Damian being a sick whiney baby and his dads taking care of him, so. Ooops.

He was folding laundry, Damian sleepily watching him from the pillows. _Dick’s_ pillows, to be specific. He should have been sleeping, in his own bed no less, but this cold was keeping him up with the coughing and sore throat, and the medicine was taking a bit longer to kick in than Jason anticipated.

“Just close your eyes, baby.” Jason whispered, glancing up from the shirts as he dumped them onto the end of the bed. “You’ll fall asleep soon.”

Damian sniffed. Loud, wet and nasally. “Where’s Didi?”

“Doing Nightwing stuff.” Jason smiled. “But he promised he’ll cut it short tonight for you.”

Damian blinked, looking a little unimpressed. “ _How_ short.”

“Short.” Jason smiled, moved around the mattress and sat at Damian’s side, holding his palm against the toddler’s forehead. “But still long enough that you better be asleep by the time he gets back.”

Damian pursed his lips. Stared up at Jason with glossy eyes.

Jason was just about to move his hand away, maybe brush his fingers through Damian’s hair, when his cell phone rang. And sick or not, Damian _loved_ answering the phone. So before even Jason could even register the ringtone, Damian was flopping across the bed and grabbing the device.

“Hello.” Damian practically whispered. His face suddenly brightened, at least as much as it could, which wasn’t much. “Hi Robin.”

_Tim._

Jason frowned, and was going to go back to folding. He was not the current Robin’s biggest fan, even after all this time, much to Dick’s dismay. But regardless, there was no doubt that Dick told his little _buddy_ that Damian wasn’t feeling well today, and Tim, ever the eager little _freaking_ beaver, was just going to _try_ and cheer his mentor’s pseudo-child up.

So it was a surprise when Damian suddenly turned towards him and said, “Yeah, he’s right here.” Damian blinked, then sighed, holding the phone out. “For you, Baba.”

Jason hesitantly took the phone, held it up to his ear and practically barked. “Yeah.”

“Call a babysitter.” Tim said immediately, his voice desperate and…and scared? “Jason. M-Mr. Todd, please, I need your help.” A pause, if the quick second could be called that. “I need you to stop him.”

Jason felt his chest tighten. “Stop who?”

“Nightwing.” The name was breathed, almost like it was a curse. “Oh, God, Jason. You need to stop him.”

Jason glanced down at Damian, who was staring blankly up at him. “Stop him from doing what?”

“Making the biggest mistake of his life.”

There was a shout in the background, but Jason didn’t mention it. Tim didn’t either. “You’re going to have to stop talking in damn riddles, kid. What’s he-”

_“He’s going to kill the Joker.”_

Jason looked down at Damian again.

_Oh._

~~

Jason couldn’t thank his lucky stars enough for his neighbor, Mrs. Estrada. That woman was a godsend, a damn _saint_. It didn’t matter that it was closer to midnight than not, or that it was the middle of the week. Jason called her, and she showed up at his door less than a minute later.

“Baba!” Damian whined, kicking his feet under the blankets even as Mrs. Estrada took Jason’s spot on the edge of the bed. “You said-”

“I know, I’m sorry.” Jason murmured quickly, leaning over and pressing a kiss to Damian’s forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

Damian huffed and crossed his arms.

“The meds should be kicking in soon. When he falls asleep, you can just go watch TV out in the living room, you don’t have to sit back here with him.” Jason rambled off, even as he slid his jacket on over his sweatshirt, then went digging for his boots. “Dick and I shouldn’t be…I don’t know, more than an hour? Hour and a half, tops?”

“Take as long as you need.” Mrs. Estrada promised, already pulling the blanket up Damian’s chest comfortingly. “A family emergency is a family emergency. There is no schedule for you to keep.” She smiled up at him. “Damian and I will be right here when you come back.”

And Jason couldn’t help it. He rushed forward, and kissed her forehead too. “Thank you so much, Mrs. E.” He glanced down at Damian, shoving his boots onto his feet. “ _Behave_ , baby.”

Damian refused to respond, but Jason couldn’t stick around until he did. He ruffled at Damian’s hair, flopped the hood of his sweatshirt over the collar of his jacket, then ran down the hall and out the door.

The ride felt like it took forever, even though he was on his bike and taking alleyways. Running red lights and ducking through traffic.

_Don’t be too late, don’t be too late…_

He spotted Robin standing outside a building on the bad side of town and was, for once, grateful for the uniform’s obnoxious color scheme. Batgirl – Cassandra – was standing protectively next to him, staring back into the building, fists clenched like she’d rather be in there.

Tim recognized him as soon as he turned the corner, and came running towards him. Jason slowed the bike, ripping the helmet off as Tim approached.

“Put this on.” Tim demanded urgently, holding out a red domino mask. “B doesn’t want to take any chances.”

Jason, for once, didn’t fight his successor. Just grabbed the mask and shoved it onto his face. He felt a wave of nostalgia, then. Of wistfulness and regret, and just a tinge of bitterness.

It’d been a while, since he wore one of these things. Not since…

He kicked out the bike’s stand almost as an afterthought, and went trailing after Tim towards a side door. Batgirl met them there, and grabbed Jason’s arm before he could step inside.

“Baby?” She whispered.

“Safe.” Jason promised, then clasped his hand over hers. “But if anything happens to me or ‘Wing tonight. If this doesn’t go well, take care of him for me?”

He could see her mouth curve into a frown behind the fabric of her mask, but she nodded anyway. He smiled, squeezed her hand, and then continued into the building.

The shouting he’d heard on the phone was louder now. Echoing through the hallways of the apparent warehouse. Dispersed between the syllables were the sounds of punches. Of blood. Of pain.

Jason shuddered at the memories it brought back.

“We couldn’t think of anything else.” Tim was rambling. “He wouldn’t listen to me. Wouldn’t listen to B. Batgirl was going to try to knock him out or something, but…I don’t know. It just didn’t sit well with me.” Tim stopped at a doorway, the yelling obviously coming from behind it. Tim glanced back at him. Sadly, fearfully.

And Jason suddenly remembered. This kid loved Dick, too.

“So, I-I.” Tim shook his head. “I know it might’ve been a little dumb, but I thought. Maybe, you know. Since you two are…I _thought_ -”

Jason clapped a hand on his shoulder.

(Being nice to him just this once wouldn’t kill him.)

“You did the right thing.” Jason promised, passing by him. “Leave this to me.”

He straightened his shoulders as he walked onto the warehouse floor. The shouting was loud and – as he realized now – so obviously Dick. Dick screaming, Dick _punching_.

He saw Batman standing in the opposite corner, obviously torn. Let Dick continue his assault? It was the Joker, after all. He probably did _something_ to warrant the beating. Or stop Dick and risk the Joker getting away? _Again_?

Jason met Bruce’s gaze as he walked quietly into the room, but did nothing else.

“You’re. A. _Monster_.” Dick hissed, punching Joker square on his jaw between every word. The Joker just laughed. “You’ve hurt too many people. And I _won’t_ let it continue.”

The Joker squealed gleefully.

“You’ve tortured. You’ve murdered. You’ve destroyed lives, and families and _cities_.” Dick roared, throwing one last terrible hit. “But worst of all. _Worst_ of _all_ …”

He suddenly hurled Joker to the ground. Straddled his chest took and wrapped his hands around the Joker’s throat.

“Worst of all.” Jason watched Dick’s muscles contract. Watched him squeeze the clown’s neck until the Joker gagged, then squeezed harder. Jerked the criminal up until they were nose to nose. _“You took him from me.”_

Jason felt himself involuntarily stand taller. In his periphery, saw Batman twitch.

“And he,” Dick barked, slamming the Joker’s head against the concrete floor over and _over_ , with every word. “Was not. Yours. To. _Take_.”

That was enough. It was everything Jason ever wanted. The Joker dead, tortured and beaten like that madman had done to him all those years ago. Vengeance dealt out by his so-called family, by those who claimed to love him. Freedom from this fear that the Joker could ever hurt him again.

Everything he wanted, but suddenly. Suddenly, he didn’t want _any_ of it.

From Bruce, yeah. Tim, sure. Barbara, maybe.

But not from Dick.

 _Never_ from Dick.

It was enough.

He stepped forward. He didn’t shout. Didn’t raise his voice. Just said, “Nightwing.”

And Jason didn’t know if the others had tried the tactic, tried just speaking to their beloved bird.  They probably had, but he could tell by the crazed look in Dick’s eyes that he probably would have ignored them. Probably _did_.

But now, with him, the lenses of Dick’s mask suddenly widened, and he twisted around like a kid caught cheating by a teacher.

Guess Tim made the right call after all.

The Joker’s blood was splattered across his face, beads of sweat running down his cheeks. Bruises and cuts mixed in there, too. Jason didn’t dwell on it, though. Ignored the wreck Dick was physically to focus on the mess Dick was mentally.

He took another step forward. “You’ve gotta stop, ‘Wing.”

“No.” Dick whispered, sounding like Damian when the toddler didn’t want to go to bed. “No, I…I _can’t_. He took you away. He took you from us, from _me_ , and he needs to-”

“A _new_ mask?!” The Joker screeched in amusement. “Do I know you, pal? Who’re _you_ supposed to be?!”

Dick turned back towards the man, and Jason could see his mind reeling, that fury building back up.

“’Wing-”

“Very casual.” The Joker continued appraisingly. “Red sweatshirt under a leather jacket is fashionable, I guess.” Suddenly, he grinned, the smile missing too many teeth. “You the new _Red Hood_ or something, kiddo?”

Joker swallowed the lump in his throat. Fought to not rise to the bait.

Dick grit his own teeth, and Jason saw his muscles tightening in anticipation. “Don’t you _dare_ speak to him, you-”

“Nightwing.” Jason repeated. “Come here.”

Dick hesitated.

“Come here, babe. Please.” Jason whispered, holding his hand out, knowing his words were dangerous, knowing the Joker could use it against them at any time. “He isn’t worth it.”

“But you are.” Dick spat back instantly. “ _You_ are, and I won’t let him touch you again. I’ll do what Batman won’t, I don’t care. I’ll make sure this pile of _filth_ won’t ever hurt you agai-”

“Then don’t let him take you.” Jason countered. Kept his hand firmly out. “You just said he took me from you. Don’t let him take you from me, too.”

Dick rocked, seemed to be thinking about his options. Still seemed to be leaning towards that darkness.

And it was the _most_ dangerous thing of all, but Jason couldn’t think of much else. Knew that even above himself, Dick had a bigger weakness. A weakness that was lying in their bed back home, nursing a sore throat and a grudge that would last until they returned.

“Don’t let him take you away from…” He hesitated, then. Not sure how to reference their baby without exposing his identity completely. But by the way Dick suddenly blinked, and sat up straighter, it looked like he didn’t have to go any further than that. “He’s sick and he’s miserable and he…he just wants his…” _Dad. Didi. Favorite._ “…He just wants you to come home.”

Dick didn’t say anything, but he lowered the Joker’s head slowly back to the ground.

“But you won’t be able to do that if you kill him. Batman will have to take you to prison, and I’ll have to let him.” Jason inhaled sharply at the thought. Swallowed the emotion charging up his throat. “If you kill him, Nightwing, it doesn’t matter what you want, what or who you did this for. It won’t even matter what _I_ want, or that I would be the most grateful person in the world for your actions. For _you_.” Jason had to stop, at his own mind reeling. He hated these thoughts. Hated the possibility that he could lose Dick, just because Dick had the balls to do what no one else would. “If you do this, you won’t ever see me, or _him_ , ever again.”

Dick just stared down at the Joker, who was still weakly chuckling. His fingers twitched, and Jason was happy to see they were twitching to release, not tighten.

Jason let thirty seconds roll by before he tried again. Pushed his arm a little further out. “Come here, beautiful.”

And Jason couldn’t help but smile in relief, when Dick did just that. When he released Joker’s neck and rocked up to his feet. When he swung his leg forward and spun away from the madman.

Joker wasn’t done, though. Rolled to his side and tried to grab Dick’s foot. But, for once, Jason was grateful for Bruce, who swooped in immediately. Grabbed the Joker by his collar and threw him against a pillar.

Dick didn’t seem to notice what was happening right behind him, though. Kept his focus on Jason’s hand, on reaching it, and grabbing it. Jason took the momentum to his advantage. Didn’t care who was watching. Pulled Dick against his chest, wrapped a possessive arm around his hips. Kissed his temple even as Dick pressed his face against his throat.

“He took you away.” Dick mumbled into his skin, ducking his fingers under the leather jacket, grabbing hold of the loose fabric of the hoodie. “He took you away and he hurt you and he has to _pay_ for that-!”

“Shhh.” Jason tried, using his free hand to card through Dick’s hair. “He did, I know he did. And he’ll pay for that, one day. Maybe. But babe. Gorgeous. You’re forgetting something.”

He felt Dick inhale, his breath hitch as he shifted, to look up at Jason.

“He took me away.” Jason reiterated, dragging his hand down from Dick’s hair to hold his face, gently pressing their foreheads together. “But I came _back_.”

Dick exhaled. Closed his eyes and pushed against Jason’s weight.

“I came back.” Jason repeated, then chuckled. Glanced over towards Bruce, who was still dealing with the Joker. The Joker, who seemed to have lost all interest in them, was too busy cackling in Bruce’s face to be listening to them. He kept his smile, as he refocused on Dick. “I came back, with a _baby_.”

Dick’s fingers tightened in Jason’s sweatshirt.

“With a baby who’s missing the hell out of you right now.” Jason whispered. Stroked his thumb across Dick’s cheek. “So why don’t I take you back to him, hm? Why don’t we head home, and put our baby to bed. Because right now he’s in ours, and if we don’t hurry, it’s going to be overrun with stuffed animals, and you and me are gonna be sleeping on the couch.”

Dick flashed a smile. A quick one, Jason would have missed it if he blinked. Dick kept his eyes closed, even as he breathed, “…I’m sorry, Jay.”

“Don’t apologize for something you didn’t do.” Jason soothed. “In fact, I think it should be _me_ thanking _you_ , for attempting it. For even _thinking_ about doing it. That’s a hell of a lot more than Batman ever did for me.”

Dick kept his frown, tugged harder on Jason’s hoodie.

“Or maybe, instead of apologizing to me, you should be making a thank you fruit basket to bird brain over there.” Dick’s eyes flashed open. “It was Robin who called me. Got me here. Gave me this dumb ass mask.”

Dick’s eyes twitched around Jason’s face, then he smiled softly. “I _like_ the mask. Looks good on you.”

“Yeah, don’t get any ideas.” Jason laughed, pulling back, sliding his hand down Dick’s arm, clutching at his fingers. “Our kid already has three out of four parents somehow involved in the vigilante game, he sure as hell doesn’t need another one. Besides,” He smirked, let go of Dick’s hips for a second, to run his middle finger along the bottom seam of the mask. “I don’t think red’s much my color, do you?”

Dick laughed too, and came willingly enough when Jason tugged him. Hand returning to Dick’s hips, Jason whirled around, leading him towards the door Tim was still standing in. He glanced over his shoulder, though. One last time.

“Hey, B!” Batman looked up from his task, tying a barely conscious Joker to the pillar. “I’m taking him.”

Bruce looked at them both silently. Remorsefully. _Guiltily_.

Nodded.

“And you’re going to give him a few days off.” Jason added. Bruce hesitated a second, but then nodded in agreement. Jason nodded back, then returned his attention to the door, and leading Dick carefully out. Tim was watching them, eyes wide, worried, and breath held. And Jason was a sucker. Was a _huge_ sucker. Still hated this kid, but smiled anyway, and whispered as they passed him, “You did good, Rob.”

And even as he turned away, back down the hall, pulling Dick into his side so he could support his weight, he could hear Tim deflate in relief.

“…Thank you, Jason.”

~~

Mrs. Estrada was reading on the sofa when Jason walked back in the door. He barely let her get a word out before thanking her profusely, practically lifting her from the couch and leading her towards the door himself.

“And, er, everything’s okay?” She asked hesitantly in the rush. “Where’s Dick?”

“Parking the car.” Jason lied. “He’ll be up in a few minutes.”

“Good. Damian babbled about the two of you all evening.” She smiled, stepping into the hallway. “Good luck sleeping in your own bed tonight, though. Out of spite, I believe, Damian had me fill your whole bed with his own pillows and stuffed animals and coloring books.” She laughed. “And he didn’t use or play with a single one before he fell asleep.”

“Wonderful.” Jason grinned. “Thanks again, Mrs. E.”

“As always, Jason, it’s my pleasure.” She bowed her head, and turned towards her own flat. Jason watched her reach it, before closing the door and locking it behind him. He turned to the hallway, then, darted back to his own bedroom, where, sure enough, Damian was sprawled across the bed, cocooned in a minefield of toys and pillows.

Finally, fast asleep.

Dick was already sliding in through the window, still hesitant, in case Mrs. Estrada was still there. His eyes were tired, but he was smiling as he tugged at his mask, watching Damian the whole time.

He undid the zipper, pulling the uniform down to his waist as he crossed the floor. Jason took note of the new bruises, the new injuries adorning his body, but didn’t say anything. It could wait.

He stood in the doorway, watching as Dick tiptoed across the floor, sat where he had earlier in the evening, right on the edge of the bed. Reached his ungloved fingers out and brushed them through Damian’s bangs.

“Next time you run into the Joker,” Jason whispered, already anticipating that next time. “When you’re fighting him, when you’re feeling that urge to beat him into the ground. When that anger gets too much and you think of crossing that line,” Jason sighed. “Don’t think of me. Think of him.”

Dick didn’t say anything, just pulled his hand away as Damian moved. Subconsciously angled his head toward Dick, and flopped his arm out between them.

“When your mind starts saying, ‘I’m doing this for Jason,’ stop it. Right there, in its tracks.” Jason continued quietly. “Change it from, ‘I’m doing this for Jason’ to ‘I _won’t_ do this, for Damian.’”

Dick nodded, just slightly, barely even noticeable, as he reached down, and slipped his fingers underneath Damian’s.

“Because that’s not you, Dick.” Jason admitted. “Avenging me was never _your_ job.”

“It should be.”

“No, it shouldn’t.” Jason snapped. “Your job is not to dwell in the past. Leave that brooding and angsting and regret to Bruce. Because this was all _his_ fault, not yours. His fault and his problem to find that solution to. _Your_ job… _your_ job’s to…”

Jason trailed off. Huffed in annoyance.

“Your job is to stay with your family. With Damian and…and with _me_.” Jason claimed softly. “Your job is to come home at the end of the night. To crawl into bed at four in the morning and snore ‘til six. To let Damian wake you at six-fifteen and still smile at him like you got a full night’s sleep. Your job is to eat too much cereal and watch too many bad movies.”

Dick didn’t look at him, but he was on a roll now. Slowly, he moved into the room. Walked around the bed and stood at Dick’s back. Inched forward until he could feel Dick lean back against his stomach. Gently, he placed his hand on Dick’s head.

“Your job is to take care of me _now_ , not worry about what you potentially could or couldn’t do to rectify the past.” He tried, twisting his fingers into his locks. “Just because I complain about Bruce for this very reason, doesn’t mean I want you to follow in his footsteps.” He smiled, then. “That’s the last thing, I want you to do, honestly.”

Dick sighed. Raised his free hand and took hold of Jason’s, pulling it down to his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Jay.”

“I’m not.” Jason replied instantly. “Because, beautiful, I’d rather have you here, dealing with this cranky, sick little toddler, than the Joker dead. Either in general or by your hands.”

Dick squeezed his hand, leaned further into his stomach.

“So, like I said. Next time you run into the Joker. Don’t think you need to kill him for me.” Jason repeated, leaning down to Dick’s free shoulder, kissing from his temple to his jaw. He pulled his hand off Dick’s shoulder, reached down and fixed Damian’s blanket. “Think of this little baby right here, and how you need to come home to him. No matter _what_.”

Dick hummed, leaned into Jason’s lips. “Can I still think of you too?”

“And how much you love to _kiss_ me and _hold_ me, and how a handsome man such as myself shouldn’t be left unprotected by an even _more_ handsome man who thinks about killing the guy who hurt his lover a bunch of years ago far too much?” Jason asked, wrapping his arms around Dick’s torso, careful of the new bruises. He continued his trail of kisses down Dick’s jaw, across his neck and into the hollow of his collarbone. “Why darling, I’d _love_ if you did.”

Dick laughed, deep and honest, releasing Damian’s fingers to reach up and tug at Jason’s hair. “…And do I really snore when I come home on those late nights?”

He felt Jason’s smirk as the younger pulled away, started peeling off his jacket and sweatshirt, and intermittently picking up tissues that Damian had obviously thrown around the floor in his annoyance.

“Honey, like a damn _freight train_.”

**Author's Note:**

> [Other things for Nevolition’s Dad!Jason AU](http://fishfingersandjellybabies.tumblr.com/tagged/dad%21jason+au)   
> 


End file.
